Passionate 1

I am listening to music as we speak.

Right now my passionate side is poking through.

I divide myself into two coexisting entities.

The Passionate One.

The Logical One.

Normally, when I am happy or at least somewhat satisfied with my social standing, I am the Logical One.

Tonight, everyone has other plans, so I am writing to an empty space with no face or sympathy.

I don’t need sympathy though.

I just need some kind of outlet.

Physical activity works as well.

The guy I wanted to see tonight is high and driving around without me.

This guy is not my boyfriend however.

Two separate people.

I have been with my boyfriend for three years and most people on first look would label us as a stable and happy couple who only fights every now and then constantly kissing and whispering quaint compliments into the other one’s ear.

Nope.

Not even close.

I am sure many couples are like this, aware of the distance between how they really are and how they appear to others, but this is a special circumstance.

Only I am the one who is aware.

He has no idea I am not happy.

Hell, he has no idea what I really think.

Whenever my true thoughts stumble out of my mouth, I have to spend hours attempting to assure him that it was a silly thought with absolutely no bearing on my real feelings.

Nope.

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