Her eyes are so full of life, so bright. I don’t even remember how we got onto this topic, but she is gesticulating wildly as her face contorts into different expressions to convey the mood of her situation. Her hands are flapping about, her arms waving, and her hair bouncing all over the place as she acts out her first kiss. I just sit back and smile at her innocence and naivety.
This is her first relationship even though she is eighteen years old. She always wanted her first kiss to be special. So much so that she would refuse a kiss, even if she desperately wanted to kiss the guy, just because it did not feel like the moment was right or that it could be better.
Whereas I had my first kiss in preschool. Most people will retort and say my first kiss doesn’t count because I didn’t know what I was doing in preschool, but what most people don’t realize is that by the age of eighteen, when most people have had their first sucking of face, the innocence and the rush of euphoria, or disgust in some poor souls’ case, in that moment we are all children unaware of the consequences and unaware of what the future holds.
We know not what we do. We know not why we do it.
Take a step back and look at the actual performance of a kiss. It is quite literally the smashing together of two orifices meant for communication and digestion to show affection and love.
Humans are cute little creatures. We send little messages with our eyes across rooms, we are mesmerized by the sky, we find meaning in the most mundane of situations. We fall in love, we stretch our mouths into this wide toothy image and call it a smile, we are odd creatures who live a beautiful life. Most of us do anyways. There are examples of people who are so deeply jaded by the circumstance of existence that they ignore all the beauty and marvel of the world and insert their own reality that is sticky with corruption and oozing greed. Both realities are true in their own rights.
Think of a coin. Two sides, yes? When looking at one side, however, you cannot truly see the other side at the same time. You know it is there, or at least you believe it is there, but you have no visual evidence of the other side’s existence until you turn the coin with your fingers to reveal the other face. These two realities work the same way. The jaded skeptic knows that there is a version of the world out there that is gleams and glows with the innocent wonder of the optimists. The enthused romantic also knows that there is a version of the world out there that is cracked and broken beyond repair. Both sides believe the other exists, but neither side truly understands what the world looks like to the other side.